Sept. 29, 2025

198 : Is Money a Drug? with Nirav Shah

In this episode: Nirav Shah's journey, the impact of money on happiness, daily practices for mindfulness, understanding contentment, the concept of enough, with Guest Nirav Shah. Episode Summary Join us for an enlightening conversation with Nirav Shah as he discusses his new book "The Serenity Blueprint," shares insights on finding inner peace regardless of external circumstances, and explores the interplay between mindfulness and financial independence. Guest Bio Nirav Shah is a civil engine...

Show Notes
Transcript

In this episode: Nirav Shah's journey, the impact of money on happiness, daily practices for mindfulness, understanding contentment, the concept of enough, with Guest Nirav Shah.

Episode Summary
Join us for an enlightening conversation with Nirav Shah as he discusses his new book "The Serenity Blueprint," shares insights on finding inner peace regardless of external circumstances, and explores the interplay between mindfulness and financial independence.

Guest Bio
Nirav Shah is a civil engineer turned software executive who has traveled to 84 countries and worked on six continents. After retiring early, he dedicated his life to helping others find inner peace through meditation and writing. His first book, "Shortcut to Serenity," aims to help individuals discover peace within themselves. Nirav's latest work, "The Serenity Blueprint," continues this mission.
Resources & Books Mentioned

Guest Contact Information

Nirav Shah on LinkedIn

Key Takeaways

Nirav's journey emphasizes the importance of finding peace within oneself, regardless of external conditions.
Money does not equate to happiness; true contentment comes from appreciating what we have.
Daily practices like meditation and taking deep breaths can significantly enhance mindfulness.
Letting go of rigid expectations allows for a more fluid approach to life and personal goals.
Recognizing the difference between 'life' and 'lifestyle' can help determine what is truly enough.
The importance of enjoying the journey rather than focusing solely on end results is key to achieving serenity.

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A...

WEBVTT

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Welcome to the Mindful Fire Podcast, a show about crafting a life you love and making work optional using the tools of mindfulness, envisioning, and financial independence.

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I'm your host, Adam Quail, and I'm so glad you're.

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If you're ready to start your Mindful Fire journey, go to mindful fire.org/start and download my free envisioning guide in just 10 minutes.

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This guide will help you craft a clear and inspiring vision for your life.

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Again, you can download it for free@mindfulfire.org slash start.

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Let's jump into today's.

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Episode.

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Nirav welcome back to the Mindful Fire Podcast.

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I'm so thrilled to have you back.

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Thanks for

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having me.

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It's been fun.

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I enjoyed our last meeting, so I'm excited about our new meeting.

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Me too.

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Yeah, so for the audience, Nirav is actually back on the podcast after a three year hiatus, which we were just talking about, and I cannot believe that it's been three years.

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But NAAB joined us on episode 64 of the podcast to talk about his first book, and now he has a new book coming out.

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And I'll let him talk about both of those books.

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And, but Nirav I'm thrilled to have you back and would love to have you share a little bit about you for anyone who didn't catch that episode, and a little bit about what you've been up to since we last spoke.

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Sure.

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again, thanks for having me.

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My name is Nirav Sha and I'm a civil engineer by education.

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I ended up being a software

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executive.

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I have

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a travel bug.

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I've been to 84 countries.

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I worked in dozens of countries on six continents.

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And during all of those things, I realized that there is no end to this.

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It's a red race, and contentment was the key to happiness.

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So I retired early, said, you know what?

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Let's just hang the hat and move forward.

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And once I retired, I joined a couple of nonprofits to help them.

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And then also found meditation.

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I got involved in meditation about eight years ago and four years ago, I ended up writing my first book, shortcut to Serenity.

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That's when you and I talked first and I had this passion, Adam, for helping people.

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Find that allus you, peace within yourself, right?

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We all say, yes, there's a peace within you, but we can't find it.

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And I have this passion to help people find that when I wrote my first book, we talked about it.

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That goal for that project was to help one person.

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If we change one person's life, did our job.

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And I'm happy to say that a lot of people came and say, you know what?

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This book changed my life.

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So that kind of inspired me to write the second book.

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It's, in the same, John, if you will.

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it's called the Serenity Blueprint, right?

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How to find peace with, regardless of what happens outside.

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And that's the key.

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cause right now we let what happens outside affect our inner peace.

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We got a flat tire.

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We get upset.

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It's okay to have a flat tire.

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It's not your problem.

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It's car's problem.

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You do what it takes to fix it, but let's not disturb our inner peace because of external condition.

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So that's been my passion.

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It's so great to hear.

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How about the success of the first book and how I, I love the goal of just helping a single person, right?

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If we, set these ambitious goals of, you know, want to help a million people, whatever, this and that.

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But ultimately it's all about just helping yourself and helping one person.

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Yep.

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It can make a huge difference and that has been my experience with the podcast.

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I used to look at all the download numbers and try to get'em to go up all the time.

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and that's fine, but it was exhausting.

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And then instead, speaking of letting outside conditions affect my inner peace, completely meaningless numbers, by the way.

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But when I focused instead on taking in the good, when people reach out and tell me, oh, I love this episode.

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Or, this workshop you did changed my life.

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All of those things.

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That one person means so much more than, a million downloads and things like that.

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So it's cool that that was your goal and sounds like it helped not only one person, but quite a few people in the process.

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So that's wonderful to hear.

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And as you mentioned.

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sometimes people come to you and say, It changed your life, right?

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in your case, someone attended your workshop and said, Hey, it really changed my life.

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And all I tell them is that please pay it forward.

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if it helped you try to help someone in a similar situation, because now you're in a position to say, I've been through it.

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I can help you.

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So that's all I ask.

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Please pay it forward.

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So

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yeah that's great.

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And so, yeah, walk us through, you know, the new, the new book and what, what's in it, what are some of the lessons that that brought you to, write it and would love to Yeah.

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Just to hear more about it.

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Absolutely.

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So, again, as you know, we are all learning right as we go along.

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So we learned few lessons from the first book, and based on that, I put together this second book in different sections.

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So we thought it would be good to start with a section on foundation of serenity, right?

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What it means to have positive outlook in life, right?

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And then we go into how happiness is an inside job.

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And give you an example.

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I don't know about you.

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You probably, you live in East Coast, so you also like pizza, I'm assuming I do, but I love pizza.

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And you gimme a slice of pizza.

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I'm in heaven, right?

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Second slice.

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I love it.

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The third slice I eat, I'm usually not too thrilled.

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Now if I continue eating, if I eat seven, eight slices, I'll throw up, right?

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So that tells me that if pizza was happiness right, I would be happy with 10th, 11, 12th.

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20 it slice, but I'm not.

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So that means happiness is not outside.

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And that's just an example, right?

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Same thing goes for money, right?

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So happiness is inside job.

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we talk about, that we need to learn to go inside ourselves.

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And way to do that is to change our mind, right?

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Change your mind, change your world, right?

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I truly believe in that.

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And then I touch on something called is money a drug?

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let me kind of set this up.

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About, year or so ago, I was on a long flight and I'm watching this documentary about these people.

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The scientists are giving sugar to rats and more sugar.

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They gave them more, they got used to with it.

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And, they needed more and more sugar to get stimulus.

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And that got me thinking that is money a drug?

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So I started doing research, And if you think about it, right when I first started someone, my first job, they gave me a$2 an hour raise.

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And I was thrilled, right?

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I was excited at peak of my career.

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If somebody gave me$2 an hour raise, I would be insulted, right?

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So the same two bucks, what changed?

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Two bucks is two bucks regardless, right?

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What changes is your value of money, right?

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So I started doing research on this and I found something very interesting.

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Adam, in your city of Minnesota did a research in the Chinese campus.

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I didn't know they had a Chinese campus, but they did a research in this Chinese campus.

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And there are two groups of people.

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To one group, they gave a hundred dollars bills to count to other group.

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They gave just piece of paper to count, just blank Once they were done counting, they put 122 degree Fahrenheit hot water bowl in front of them and asked them to dip their fingers in it.

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The people who had plain piece of paper, got burned and people who were counting money didn't feel a thing.

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I was like, wow, that's kind of interesting.

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So then they did another study and okay, let's help people with their loved ones and then, have them put their fingers in hot water bowl.

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Same thing.

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They didn't feel anything, so their conclusion was that people equate money with love.

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And I was like, wow, something totally different, right?

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So I was very fascinated by it.

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I started doing more and more research and if money is a drug, then can it be addictive?

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And there are obvious signs, right?

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Gambling and this and that.

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But I learned something unexpected that excessive saving habits can be a form of money addiction.

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And that was news to me, Those who save excessively tend to believe that more money will bring more happiness.

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I was like, wow.

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and then I started getting deeper into it and found this book coined by a guy named Kabi Segal.

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And he's found that money has similar effect on your brain as cocaine.

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So neuroeconomist, they did brain scans who were about to make money, and the results were staggering, right?

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According to him, those making money showed the same neurological response in their pleasure centers as those high on cocaine.

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Think about that.

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That is out of this world, right?

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did not expect that.

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Pretty interesting.

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So that's kind of how I started.

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That's the first section of my book.

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Go ahead.

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No, it's very interesting.

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I mean, it's, I've never done cocaine, but I have made a little bit of money, but, I can relate to, especially in the entrepreneurial sense, right?

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Like, if I get my paycheck at my W2 job, that happens automatically.

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But if I.

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Earn money through my entrepreneur, I get super pumped.

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I'm like very excited.

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Yeah.

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so could see that makes sense.

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Yeah.

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Yeah.

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And, that's the thing, right?

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When you are making a paycheck and things have changed in a sense that we are in digital world, you don't even see a paycheck anymore, Right.

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The money just goes in your bank account.

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So I'm assuming that that probably has reduced some of that, like, you know, as if, as opposed to somebody actually gave you a paycheck, I'm sure it would have a different effect.

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Right?

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I just don't know.

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But, I think that would be an interesting study as well.

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In fact, they did that study with credit cards, this was 25, 30 years ago, visa did a study and noticed that people who pay cash, and that's why that's one of the reason try to pay cash with everything and not use credit card.

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As opposed to if you just swipe the credit card where there's a$2 or$200 the same signature.

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Right?

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So you don't have effect.

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I just spent a couple of hundred bucks.

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Right?

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So it's quite interesting.

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It doesn't feel as real.

00:11:16.410 --> 00:11:17.191
Exactly.

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Got it.

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So you said you start the book with this idea that money is a drug.

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Yeah.

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And so, kind of what was your, take on that?

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So then I go about how much is enough, right?

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you and I had that discussion during last podcast how much is enough?

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Because if you think about it, our expenses keep growing as we, move up in life, if you will.

00:11:40.446 --> 00:11:42.946
we all want McMansions, right?

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we all want.

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3000 square feet house.

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do we really need a 3000 square feet house?

00:11:47.806 --> 00:11:51.865
Especially once, kids are no longer at home, right?

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When kids are out of house, What do you need?

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And so go into how much is enough?

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Because I think that's the key to contentment.

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wall Street has a number, you and I discussed that.

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But more importantly, we need to figure out that, do we need to consume as much as we consume?

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Okay.

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Do we need that new iPhone sixteen, eighteen, twenty five, whatever the heck it number is now, Mm-hmm.

00:12:16.114 --> 00:12:24.764
Every year, It's their job to keep pushing on us, but I think we need to realize, I remember, I don't know about you, I remember cell phone lasting four or five years.

00:12:24.813 --> 00:12:30.894
Right now they're designed that they'll start, slow down in two years, Yeah.

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we consume so much.

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I think it's the consumption keeps, wanting us to make more and more and more.

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And that's what keeps us in the race.

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So the keeping up with the Joneses is what I'm trying to avoid.

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Go ahead.

00:12:44.293 --> 00:12:44.833
Got it.

00:12:45.234 --> 00:13:02.234
And I guess it's is the thesis that, if money is a drug, you get a little money and you want more money, Because you need more and more money To keep getting the same good feeling or high in the sense of a drug, you get a little bit of drug.

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your body reacts, you have a great time or whatever, and then you want more.

00:13:06.884 --> 00:13:10.094
And so is that kind of the thesis that you get a little money, you want more money?

00:13:10.573 --> 00:13:11.053
Yeah.

00:13:11.053 --> 00:13:15.943
And, and I go into something called life versus lifestyle, Why do you want more money?

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You want more money because you keep adding to your lifestyle.

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Instead of living your life, enjoying life, you're trying to enjoy lifestyle and that's something you're never going to end chasing if you keep going, It's keeping up with Jones's syndrome, Mm-hmm.

00:13:33.288 --> 00:13:41.969
Because if you enjoy your life, you're happy with who you are, then you won't need that next big thing, You won't need the next best car.

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And if you don't need the next best car, then presumably you won't chase money as much.

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So I go into life versus lifestyle a little bit, and once I set that up, I go into, how do you adapt to this constant change your life brings?

00:14:00.089 --> 00:14:00.599
Okay?

00:14:01.168 --> 00:14:08.418
Because if you think about it all day long, we are trying to fix things, We call it, putting out fires, right?

00:14:08.448 --> 00:14:08.538
Mm-hmm.

00:14:09.038 --> 00:14:12.229
And instead of that, I say, let's look at it.

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Our choices we make in our life, some of the culprits I identify are comparison, right?

00:14:19.068 --> 00:14:21.708
We compare ourselves with others, right?

00:14:21.769 --> 00:14:22.729
Why do we do that?

00:14:23.418 --> 00:14:27.619
And then in general, people are afraid of uncertainty.

00:14:28.119 --> 00:14:32.369
So I talk about how we should embrace uncertainty, okay?

00:14:32.818 --> 00:14:33.719
And I give an example.

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I know this guy quite possibly, he's the single most, successful retail trader in the industry, financial He has had days, he has made more money than Goldman Sachs.

00:14:46.083 --> 00:14:46.833
I'm not kidding you.

00:14:47.224 --> 00:14:47.403
Okay?

00:14:47.403 --> 00:14:49.464
He showed me his numbers, okay?

00:14:49.964 --> 00:14:51.734
And I asked him, I interviewed him.

00:14:51.734 --> 00:14:54.244
I said, Mitch, tell me.

00:14:54.744 --> 00:15:02.573
What it is that makes you successful when 99.99% of the retail people who try to date rate fail, right.

00:15:02.604 --> 00:15:03.384
They lose money.

00:15:04.033 --> 00:15:05.354
And he said something very interesting.

00:15:05.354 --> 00:15:09.403
He said, Nira, I go into a day not expecting anything.

00:15:09.903 --> 00:15:12.094
I look at what the market brings and that's it.

00:15:12.094 --> 00:15:13.864
I'm not expecting market to go up.

00:15:13.894 --> 00:15:15.543
I'm not expecting market to go down.

00:15:16.043 --> 00:15:23.274
And I thought that was such a profound thing because if you look at everything in, in life, what disappoints us, his expectations.

00:15:23.528 --> 00:15:23.538
Right?

00:15:23.538 --> 00:15:23.548
Mm-hmm.

00:15:24.068 --> 00:15:29.239
You expected your spouse to, take the trash out and, and he or she didn't, right?

00:15:29.389 --> 00:15:29.568
Mm-hmm.

00:15:29.808 --> 00:15:34.009
Now you're upset, but if that expectation wasn't there, life's beautiful.

00:15:34.259 --> 00:15:39.538
That's a really good, point And something I've been thinking a lot about, actually, because.

00:15:40.208 --> 00:15:43.698
I teach this in my mastermind program, the Fire Starter Mastermind.

00:15:43.999 --> 00:15:53.369
And in the workshops that I'm doing for companies, my ask what's possible workshop, essentially, in both of those, I'm getting people to think really big about what they want for their life.

00:15:53.729 --> 00:15:53.938
Yeah.

00:15:54.438 --> 00:15:59.389
And to come up with a big vision for their life so that they can live into that next chapter.

00:15:59.509 --> 00:15:59.778
Right.

00:15:59.778 --> 00:16:05.828
Whether it's, as a team or as an individual who's looking to, make the jump into early retirement.

00:16:05.828 --> 00:16:05.889
Yeah.

00:16:06.158 --> 00:16:18.453
A lot of people don't know what they want, but at the same time, I also try to teach that there's a difference between a vision and expectations or a goal.

00:16:18.453 --> 00:16:19.413
A goal, right.

00:16:19.413 --> 00:16:19.504
Yeah.

00:16:19.833 --> 00:16:25.403
And basically the difference in my mind is that an expectation is very rigid.

00:16:25.524 --> 00:16:27.203
It's very specific.

00:16:27.264 --> 00:16:28.614
It looks a certain way.

00:16:28.614 --> 00:16:30.264
It happens at a certain time.

00:16:30.764 --> 00:16:34.604
And if it doesn't go exactly like that, you're disappointed.

00:16:35.124 --> 00:16:35.224
Yeah.

00:16:35.229 --> 00:16:39.379
And so it's very easy to set yourself up for failure.

00:16:39.859 --> 00:16:42.678
And it's very subtle as well.

00:16:42.678 --> 00:16:45.678
Like you don't even know you're setting expectations sometimes.

00:16:45.859 --> 00:16:45.979
Yeah.

00:16:45.979 --> 00:17:00.068
I'll give an example, like, well, let me just say first a vision on the other hand, as I teach it, is it's specific in that you want a certain thing, but you can't control how or when that's going to happen.

00:17:00.349 --> 00:17:00.739
Right?

00:17:00.859 --> 00:17:06.169
And so if you have set that vision as an expectation, you are setting yourself up to be disappointed.

00:17:06.378 --> 00:17:19.489
But if you instead just say, that would be awesome if this happened and you stay open to when and how it actually comes about, and you do what I call plant the seeds with envisioning practices.

00:17:19.489 --> 00:17:25.818
You, you talk about your vision, you visualize it, you journal about it, you take action towards it.

00:17:26.318 --> 00:17:37.568
If you put, plant those seeds little by little, when the opportunity presents itself, you'll be ready to take action on it and you'll be ready to step into that, that thing you envisioned.

00:17:38.068 --> 00:17:45.469
But the, if it's an expectation and you're expecting it to, happen in the next three months, you're probably gonna be disappointed.

00:17:46.249 --> 00:17:59.628
And this has happened to me, even though I literally, this is so meta, the way this is all coming out for me is, I spent all of last month planning a workshop for, executive administrative assistants at Google.

00:17:59.868 --> 00:18:07.489
Essentially, I had had some success, bringing my workshop to Google since leaving, and I wanted to do more.

00:18:07.489 --> 00:18:08.538
So I said, okay, let me.

00:18:08.884 --> 00:18:16.834
Instead of just like trying to sell these administrative business partners by cold emailing them, let me offer them something and invite them to this workshop.

00:18:17.344 --> 00:18:21.913
And I got like a hundred of them to sign up which was awesome.

00:18:22.483 --> 00:18:22.753
Yeah.

00:18:22.753 --> 00:18:23.443
That's amazing.

00:18:23.743 --> 00:18:28.423
And then, when it was all said and done, about 70 of them had still RSVP'd.

00:18:28.423 --> 00:18:28.874
Yes.

00:18:29.294 --> 00:18:35.354
And about 35 of them showed up and I did the workshop.

00:18:35.354 --> 00:18:36.193
Everybody loved it.

00:18:36.193 --> 00:18:37.213
Feedback was great.

00:18:37.263 --> 00:18:38.403
I had a great time.

00:18:39.074 --> 00:18:54.094
afterwards I was expecting, without even really knowing it, I mean, I kind of knew it, but I had this expectation that it would be a flood of interest in my workshop and everyone would want to get me booked for their offsite and their things.

00:18:54.423 --> 00:18:57.544
And that has not materialized yet.

00:18:57.894 --> 00:18:59.153
I was disappointed.

00:18:59.653 --> 00:19:04.344
And, it was a little bit overshadowing all the good that happened, right?

00:19:04.673 --> 00:19:11.364
I very much set this goal or this, my vision for this year is really to plant seeds, right?

00:19:11.663 --> 00:19:25.344
And in this case, I knew that I was planting seeds with these, administrative business partners, but I also had this under the surface expectation that was distracting me from the fact, like I did what I needed.

00:19:25.523 --> 00:19:33.864
Essentially, I was expecting the fruit from the seed immediately after I planted it, which is just not how things work.

00:19:34.163 --> 00:19:34.223
Yeah.

00:19:34.223 --> 00:19:41.693
And so this is a bit of a long story, but, expectations really are the thing that sets us up for failure.

00:19:42.068 --> 00:19:42.699
absolutely.

00:19:42.703 --> 00:19:44.663
and that's why I don't like the word goal.

00:19:45.384 --> 00:19:46.733
Because like you mentioned, right?

00:19:46.733 --> 00:19:50.183
Goal has a specific date and a specific time and a specific thing, right?

00:19:50.453 --> 00:19:50.574
Mm-hmm.

00:19:50.814 --> 00:19:53.433
Vision, like you said, on the other hand, is much more fluid.

00:19:53.854 --> 00:19:54.243
Okay?

00:19:54.513 --> 00:19:57.183
So that, it allows you to change as the circumstances change.

00:19:57.183 --> 00:19:59.884
See, goal does not let you make changes, right?

00:19:59.884 --> 00:20:01.413
It's out there and that's about it.

00:20:01.413 --> 00:20:04.503
But circumstances change, things around you change.

00:20:04.503 --> 00:20:05.733
So you gotta make changes.

00:20:06.104 --> 00:20:10.044
you mentioned expectations and you mentioned something, fruit of your labor.

00:20:10.094 --> 00:20:10.933
you put the seed.

00:20:11.433 --> 00:20:18.144
So when in fact on Saturday, I taught a day course on Karma, okay?

00:20:18.503 --> 00:20:22.294
And somebody asked me, he says, why don't we see results of her karma right away?

00:20:22.294 --> 00:20:23.044
I do good things.

00:20:23.044 --> 00:20:24.273
I don't see the good results.

00:20:24.933 --> 00:20:27.453
I said, it's about planting a seed.

00:20:27.953 --> 00:20:29.693
Let's say you plant a seed, right?

00:20:30.193 --> 00:20:31.784
The right things have to happen.

00:20:32.473 --> 00:20:34.784
You need to have a right fertilizer, right?

00:20:34.874 --> 00:20:37.098
You need to have, right amount of water.

00:20:37.638 --> 00:20:38.778
Sun, sunshine.

00:20:38.778 --> 00:20:38.868
Mm-hmm.

00:20:39.368 --> 00:20:44.199
Everything has to happen in a certain way for it to grow.

00:20:44.628 --> 00:20:45.618
that's exactly what it is.

00:20:45.618 --> 00:20:46.729
You're planting the seed.

00:20:46.999 --> 00:20:50.929
It may take a long time and you just don't know how long, right?

00:20:51.048 --> 00:20:51.138
Mm-hmm.

00:20:51.378 --> 00:20:52.788
Before it materializes.

00:20:52.888 --> 00:20:55.169
Krishna, you heard of Krishna.

00:20:55.169 --> 00:20:57.759
He's, he is an Indian, Lord, if you will, right?

00:20:57.808 --> 00:20:58.009
Yeah.

00:20:58.784 --> 00:21:19.644
He said in, in the Epic Moha, which was an Indian epic, and there's a Indian textbook called Gita, which is Indian Bible, if you will, and he said in that, that, and I'm gonna say something in San and I'll translate for you, meaning that you do your work without expecting fruits of your labor.

00:21:20.144 --> 00:21:22.923
Let let the chips fall where they may, if you will,

00:21:23.314 --> 00:21:23.523
right?

00:21:23.528 --> 00:21:23.618
Mm-hmm.

00:21:24.378 --> 00:21:26.298
He gave that lesson 6,000 years ago.

00:21:26.298 --> 00:21:31.939
And I think it's still relevant today that we need to make sure that we do our part.

00:21:32.429 --> 00:21:38.578
if we set up a vision, then we need to make sure that we execute on that vision, of course.

00:21:38.969 --> 00:21:41.159
But beyond that, it's not in our head.

00:21:41.709 --> 00:21:45.778
It's tough to change one person, forget, 35 people.

00:21:45.898 --> 00:21:50.368
So let, best thing you can do is change yourself if something you don't like.

00:21:50.939 --> 00:21:57.388
And something I talk about that in the book as well, is that, if we move away from self, self-focus, right?

00:21:57.898 --> 00:22:01.739
Mo freedom from self-consciousness, if you will, right?

00:22:02.189 --> 00:22:07.038
Because a lot of time people have what I call this victim mindset, right?

00:22:07.648 --> 00:22:10.048
there are people who always complain, they say, why me?

00:22:10.048 --> 00:22:11.249
Mm-hmm.

00:22:11.505 --> 00:22:17.525
And I found that people who ask why me are usually not happy, they tend to be miserable.

00:22:17.944 --> 00:22:26.549
And we need to move away from this victim mindset of why me and create the abundance mindset of why not me.

00:22:27.299 --> 00:22:27.599
Right.

00:22:27.990 --> 00:22:34.039
I had a friend, Adam, about 25 years ago, he was diagnosed with terminal cancer.

00:22:34.539 --> 00:22:38.970
And when he was diagnosed, I would call him once a week and he said, how are you doing?

00:22:38.970 --> 00:22:39.720
we'll just talk.

00:22:39.720 --> 00:22:45.450
And he was a philosophy guy, so we'll talk just nonsense, if you will, for 30 minutes every week.

00:22:46.109 --> 00:22:53.400
And one day I asked him, I said, do you think your disease has anything to do with where you work?

00:22:53.900 --> 00:22:56.059
That he used to work in chemical industry?

00:22:56.359 --> 00:22:57.950
He says, I know where you're trying to go.

00:22:57.950 --> 00:23:00.109
I said, you're trying to say why me?

00:23:00.609 --> 00:23:03.369
But he says, I have three beautiful daughters.

00:23:03.869 --> 00:23:08.450
I have wonderful wife, I have great job, a nice house.

00:23:08.930 --> 00:23:11.210
And I was having all of that.

00:23:11.240 --> 00:23:13.279
I never asked the question, why me?

00:23:13.779 --> 00:23:18.849
What right do I have now that I have this terminal cancer to ask why me?

00:23:18.849 --> 00:23:20.829
And I thought it was such a beautifully put, right?

00:23:20.829 --> 00:23:21.640
Mm-hmm.

00:23:22.234 --> 00:23:23.825
That's the abundance mindset.

00:23:24.125 --> 00:23:24.214
Mm-hmm.

00:23:24.454 --> 00:23:31.224
Because then you are doing what needs to be done rather than being miserable about what it is.

00:23:31.724 --> 00:23:32.115
Yeah.

00:23:32.355 --> 00:23:32.474
Does

00:23:32.474 --> 00:23:33.045
that make sense?

00:23:33.454 --> 00:23:33.664
Yeah.

00:23:33.664 --> 00:23:34.174
Definitely.

00:23:34.174 --> 00:23:39.825
I mean, I think just doing the work Because you enjoy doing it.

00:23:40.275 --> 00:23:40.424
Yeah.

00:23:40.424 --> 00:23:41.115
And.

00:23:41.615 --> 00:23:43.515
If you don't enjoy doing it, don't do it.

00:23:43.724 --> 00:23:43.964
Right.

00:23:43.964 --> 00:23:45.615
But especially in my situation, right?

00:23:45.615 --> 00:23:47.414
Like, I'm doing this because I want to.

00:23:47.444 --> 00:23:47.505
Yeah.

00:23:47.835 --> 00:23:48.285
Right.

00:23:48.285 --> 00:23:54.484
So let me plant the seeds, let me show up, create this experience for them.

00:23:54.724 --> 00:23:54.934
Yeah.

00:23:55.035 --> 00:23:56.355
And that's, how I approached it.

00:23:56.404 --> 00:24:02.555
of course I mentioned my workshop during the session, but I wasn't like salesy.

00:24:02.555 --> 00:24:05.855
I was just giving and I had a great time.

00:24:06.255 --> 00:24:06.265
Exactly.

00:24:06.265 --> 00:24:12.214
So I don't need to, have this expectation that those seeds need to bear fruit immediately.

00:24:12.454 --> 00:24:12.605
Yeah.

00:24:12.704 --> 00:24:14.410
and so I think that makes a ton of sense.

00:24:15.099 --> 00:24:21.809
What is your advice to people on how to maybe recognize their.

00:24:22.170 --> 00:24:24.640
Expectations and let go of them.

00:24:24.640 --> 00:24:24.849
Right.

00:24:24.855 --> 00:24:30.345
I was gonna say like, not have expectations, but that's probably very challenging if at all possible.

00:24:30.464 --> 00:24:39.154
So I guess it would be how do you recognize when you're setting expectations and how do you either hold them lightly or just let go of them altogether?

00:24:39.404 --> 00:24:42.734
Like you said, it's not possible not to her expectations, right?

00:24:42.734 --> 00:24:43.634
We are human beings.

00:24:44.204 --> 00:24:54.214
But what I try to do personally is to move those expectations into vision, into fluidity, if you will.

00:24:54.625 --> 00:24:56.994
So whenever I have expectations, right?

00:24:57.535 --> 00:24:59.255
Instead of saying, let's take your example.

00:24:59.255 --> 00:25:03.424
Instead of saying, I want to have 20 workshop in two years, right?

00:25:03.480 --> 00:25:10.650

198 : Is Money a Drug? with Nirav Shah

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